Dealing with Depression

Dealing with depression is never easy. Some have called depression "The Dark Night of the Soul" and there is much truth to this in a way. The 16th century Spanish poet and Roman Catholic mystic Saint John of the Cross wrote a poem describing the dark night of the soul as a passage the soul takes from the darkness of this world into the presence of God. The journey occurs during the night, which represents the hardships and difficulties the soul meets in detachment from the world and reaching the light of the union with the Creator* To be honest depression affects each individual differently though there may be some similarities. For some depression can draw us closer to God and for some it may push them away from God. However the theme of deep loneliness and detachment seems to be common.

Depression is like facing a night with no stars or for that fact no light whatsoever. Often when I have struggled with deep depression I lose the ability to find anything in life refreshing. Laughter and a simple smile can be like a distant memory. Everything seems to have lost its wonder and with me it affects even what I eat simply because everything is bland.

Depression can come about for many reasons from Chemical Imbalances in the brain or body, other health issues, a death of a love one or a divorce or separation, to the loss of a job or some disappointment that we may face. There is physical/mental depression, and there is spiritual depression.

King Saul in the Old Testament dealt with melancholy from a spiritual depression. He would ask David to play some music for him to soothe him. King David faced depression from various events that occurred in his life. Even Jesus dealt with depression the night he was arrested. Depression is more common than many realize. To be honest depression in of itself can be a normal mood just like happiness or sadness. However depression becomes a medical problem when it is prolonged in other words when the depression last for two weeks or more.

Whatever the reason or why one must face depression the answer in of itself may or may not relieve the individual facing it. Instead many just want to know how to survive it, how to get their life back, and how to find hope.

Going back to the Dark night of the soul as I was thinking about this whole element of darkness, we each face night in the physical world around us. At a certain time in the evening the sun drifts below the horizon and night falls upon the earth. For the next ten to twelve hours our side of the earth is dark, though sometimes there is the light of the moon and stars but sometimes there is neither due to cloud coverage. Healthy normal depression is like the night with the stars and the moon, depression that is medical or spiritual related is like the night with clouds.

With that in mind ponder for a moment about what you do on a dark night when the moon is not shining, when the stars have been hidden behind thick clouds. For me I go about my nightly routine, I have my lights on in the house, I watch TV, read a book, play a game on Facebook, chat with friends, spend time with my spouse, play with my sweet little dog, and at one point or another I go to sleep or try to go to sleep. A night with clouds doesn't stop me from living my life and neither should depression stop us from living our life. (Though at times I don't feel like doing any of the above) Really it does become a matter of mind over matter when dealing with depression, though it is easy to fall for the emotions that depression brings on us, such as feeling lonely, feeling detached, feeling hopeless, feeling numb, feeling sad, or all the above however when we realize that these are just clouds and the light hasn't really gone away then we can also see that we have a choice beyond the emotion. We can either allow these clouds of emotions to control us or we can take control of the situation by going on with our life.

Now sometimes the night sky can be filled with stormy clouds and depending on the kind of storm it is it can lead to a life and death situation such as with tornadoes. When there is a tornado we seek shelter, we ready ourselves for the worse. There is no shame in seeking shelter and neither is there shame in getting help. Just like the tornado the depression can turn violent. At first it starts out with a thought here and a thought there, then the thoughts become persistent maybe it is a thought to cut our self, or maybe it is a thought to end our life. The first sign of bad weather we usually try to get to a safe place, the first sign of a dangerous thought should be treated the same way. Seeking help isn't always about having to go into a hospital, sometimes therapy helps, sometimes seeing a doctor who can prescribe certain medication can help. However like I said earlier we all deal with depression differently so what may work for someone else may not work for us and the opposite may be true too.

Prolong depression is like a hurricane or a blizzard; it blows in and stays for a while. When preparing for a hurricane or a blizzard people are told to stock up on water, non-perishable items, batteries, etc. in a sense we must do the same when facing prolong depression.

What do we need to face a depression that lingers? It is fairly weird how much the psychiatric community avoids the bible when in truth the first mental health triage recorded takes place in 1 Kings 19! And the first to perform a mental health triage is God, who treats Elijah by supplying him with what he needed to recover from a burn out. These items are what we also need when facing depression whether prolonged or not:


1. Physical rest and nourishment - (1 Kings 19:5-7). Our physical body needs the rest and the food in order to be able to function properly. When our body is exhausted we are not able to function in other areas such as mentally or spiritually. Food is another necessity however certain foods can complicate medical induced depression so read up on what can be of more benefit. The Lord prepared Elijah a cake baked on coals (this was a type of bread but not like the bread we have today). Sometimes we may have a difficult time getting sleep in such cases talking to a doctor about using a sleep aid is ideal. Also soft relaxing music may be of help as well. There are many methods that may work to help us get the rest we need.

2. Emotional and Mental Therapy - (1 Kings 19:9-14) Our emotions during a depression can really be out of whack we can go from crying to anger to numbness. In order to deal with our emotions we must be able to talk things out though at times we may not have the words to say however by expressing what we are going through helps us to see through the fog. Venting these emotions helps us mentally. A good therapist, friend or spiritual/religious leader can help. Even though during depression many don't think they can go to God however I find that by going to God whether I am angry or in tears I realize that He is big enough to handle me, and yes He is faithful to be there even though we may not feel his presence. If a person cannot pray then finding a friend or family member or perhaps church member that will is a blessing. Writing and art is also tools we can use for therapy! One more thing even if our emotions or thoughts don’t make sense we still need to be able to vent them in order to deal with them.

3. Purpose, Direction, Refocusing - (1 Kings 19:15-17) this is the next step in dealing with Depression. Often we don't come to this step on our own, for the much part a good therapist can help us to refocus or find a direction. A trusted friend can too. This takes a choice on our part. We have to choose to refocus (even if we don't feel like it, this is the mind over matter). At first finding a new direction or being able to refocus can be very difficult but just like training for a race, a track runner has to go through the pains of getting into shape, so do we. At first this may seem overwhelming and stressful however once we decide to face the depression head on and accept the reality that we face then we can once again step by step move forward in our life. (Failure is also part of the process so don't let failure become a stumbling block instead get back up and go again). This is your life and it is a choice to how we live our life.

4. TRUTH - (1 Kings 19:18) Often when we are battling depression there are many untruths that have made themselves home in our thoughts. Such untruths can be like "I am worthless" "My life is hopeless" "I would be better off dead" "I have been forsaken" such untruths can escalate the feelings of detachment, loneliness, and hopelessness. Truth truly does set us free; we must face these untruths with the Truth. Though truth can be hard to deal with however the Truth is the light we need in a dark night. It can be like a candle in a dark room, or the moon light breaking through the clouds. Therapy without the truth is of no use to anyone only when we face the truth and accept it can we truly push forward however it is our choice.

The Prophet Elijah made a choice to trust God's direction and thus was able to move forward in his own life.Each step in our journey is a choice we have to make no one else can make it for us ..

Elijah's first three choices were:

1. He took action,

2. He reached out for help,

3. and the third choice Elijah made was to listen to the voice of truth which made a world of difference.

Escaping or looking for an escape has never solved anything when dealing with depression. Drugs, alcohol, suicide, these things do not solve our problems they just magnify the situation and create more problems.

Another healthy coping mechanism is exercise (Elijah walked - 1 Kings 19:7)

Coming to terms with depression and accepting the reality that we face is a big step forward often times the person who is holding us back is our own self.

So when facing my own depression I just allow myself to do what is needed, though I don't have the physical strength at times, and though my emotions are all over the place yet I can move forward but I have to be willing to do so.

We were never intended to live this life as an island unto our own self! Depression can make us want to close our selves off from the rest of the world, however we still have a choice, maybe we do need to limit our contact with others however seclusion is not ideal!

Don't throw in the towel to a few negative thoughts and at the same time don't drown yourself in positive thoughts that may not be based on the truth instead find the balance in the truth!

Oh and a hint on finding good help when reading 1 kings notice that God did not condemn, belittle, berate, or harass Elijah neither did He manipulate him ... instead He spoke to Elijah in a still quiet voice (calm and gentle) .. God also listened to Elijah. Seeking the right help is part of our choices to make, be sure the help you seek is willing to respect you, treat you as an equal, listen to you, and provide advice that gives you a choice not ultimatums.

This is not a quick fix nor is it a cure but it is steps that we can take in order to deal with depression, it is our own individual choice in what we do, and how we deal with it.

*source about Saint John of the Cross sited from Wikipedia Saint John of the Cross



* To read about the prophet Elijah's burnout click this link The prophet Elijah's burnout